9/22

Today might have been rock bottom. In my first class, which I began jovially and merrily, I ended up getting into a confrontation with one of my "problems" and he told me my boyfriend was cheating on me-- but not in those words. I blew up, kicked him out, and got him taken out of my class. Then, after one of my kinder students gave me a hug and told me to feel better (and added that I should kick my friends' little friends out of my class too) I sat onthe floor of my classroom and sobbed.

Other devleopments during the day are people telling me my class was a "dud" and boring and my freshmen throwing CDs across the room, me screaming so loudly that I lost my voice. And the saddest part is, it worked.

maybe the only place to go is up.